It has been since June that I posted.  Some stuff has changed. Some stuff has remained the same. I have a new job.  Of course, it is pending security clearance, which I fret about everyday; and It is comforting to know I am still living on a conditional basis.  The other great thing that has happened to is that I am now 100% into mesopause. I have absolutely no drive for anything frivolous or that may feel delightful. Ugh. HRT has yet to kick in for me except in the pounds category. So, while I look plump and happy, I am miserable within. 

There is a lot to unpack from the last 5 months.  The new job,.. where to start.  Everyday, I enter my cubicle I am reminded of what could have been; and, my decision to not prsuue a career in engineering bites me in the ass. I may have the degree but, as far the 20 somethings I work with, it means nothing.

Nothing like being told by a 26 year old pinhead what the meaning of job / life balance is in private industry vs. gov is. Eye roll inserted here.

I will do what I do: head down and plod forward. 


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